Saturday, February 25, 2012




Image by FlamingText.com





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3,200 cars privately owned.
 WOW
The largest car collection in the World...............
.Tacoma, Washington State.
The museum opens this year.

thanks Kitty L





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Politics in Australia
Julia Gillard Vs Kevin Rudd
for Labour Party Leadership


Only post this because every man and his dog sent it to me
don't really give a wally!!


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IRONY








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A Police Report from Chicago


  Do the Video First...
Two or Three Times if You Want..
.THEN
 Read The Text Below...
 DON'T LOOK UNTIL YOU WATCH THE VIDEO!
You have to watch this one several times.
 But please remember the cops had to act in real time....

 THE SUSPECT DOES GET SHOT BY A POLICE OFFICER.
 THIS IS FOR REAL.







 Officers ordering the suspect to put the assault rifle down,
and it appears he is complying and then he is shot!
 Is that what you see?
 Want to know what it is like to work the streets,
and what risks you face daily?
 Watch the video again..
. Watch the suspect's right hand while he places the rifle down with his left hand.
What you don't see, but the officer behind the suspect does see,
 is the suspect pulling a hidden handgun from his rear pants,
with his right hand.
 Watch as the bad guy goes down.....
the handgun is still in his right hand.
Just a reminder...
 What you think you see at first does not always tell the truth.
 .
thanks Kitty L


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Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem
to one of her arithmetic classes:
"A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars.
 One-fifth is to go to his wife,
 one-fifth is to go to his son,
 one-sixth to his butler,
and the rest to charity.
Now, what does each get?"
After a very long silence in the classroom,
Little Morris raised his hand.
The teacher called on Little Morris for his answer.
With complete sincerity in his voice, Little Morris answered,
"A lawyer!"

thanks Toni S

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click this link to see the Eiffel tower from the ground up


thanks Liz Z




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and drive while Setting my GPS!









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Woman driver takes on the Police





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After a busy day he settled down in his train from Waterloo
 for a nap as far as his destination at Winchester ,
 when the chap sitting near him hauled out his mobile and started up:-
 "Hi darling it's Peter, I'm on the train - yes,
I know it's the 6.30 not the 4.30 but I had a long meeting -
 no, not with that floozie from the typing pool,
with the boss, no darling you're the only one in my life -
yes, I'm sure, cross my heart" etc., etc.
 This was still going on at Wimbledon ,
when the young woman opposite, driven beyond endurance,
yelled at the top of her voice,
"Hey, Peter, turn that bloody phone off and come back to bed!!"


thanks Gordon H
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Those Funny Animals











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very clever video
video


thanks Glynis G






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thanks elizabeth





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AWESOME!!!

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Kind of fun to watch your age go up
 and down as you answer the questions.
Now this is interesting, give it a try....
How long will you live?
This is a calculator that estimates your life expectancy.
It was developed by Northwestern Mutual Life.
It's interesting that there are only 13 questions.
Yet, they can predict how long you're likely to live

thanks Liz Z






WISDOM




thanks Glynis G


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I KNOW THAT I AM OLD,
BUT AM I SUPPOSED TO HAVE ILLUSIONS
WHAT THE DEVIL DID I SEE??
Now here are 3 good ones....
Wait until you see #3!.....

video



video


video

thanks Kitty L
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WAL-MART


Walmart announced that, sometime in 2012,
 it will begin offering customers a new item...Walmart's
own brand of wine.
The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with Ernest & Julio Gallo Winery
of California to produce wines at affordable prices in the $2 to $5 range.
Wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to put a bottle of the Walmart brand
 into their shopping carts but,
'There is a market for inexpensive wine,' said Kathy Micken,
professor of marketing at University of Arkansas, Bentonville.
 'However, branding will be very important.'
Customer surveys were conducted to determine the most attractive name
for the Walmart wine brands and varieties.

The top surveyed names in order of popularity were:

10. Chateau Traileur Parc
9. White Trashfindel
8. Big Red Gulp
7. World Championship Riesling
6. NASCARbernet
5. Chef Boyardeaux
4. Peanut Noir
3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar
2. Grape Expectations
1. Nasti Spumante









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Grandpa










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ALZHEIMER'S COLOR TEST

More difficult than you might think!
Color Test
A great test, do it until you get 100%!
Bet you can't get 100% on the first try! But I'm rootin' for ya...
This is pretty neat! See how you do with the colors! Have fun!
It's harder than it seems!
A brain waker-upper for today!




thanks Liz Z

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Blonde and the Blizzard

It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility
 was almost zero when the little Blonde got off work.
 She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to make it home.
 She sat in her car while it warmed up and thought about her situation...
She finally remembered her daddy's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard
 she should wait for a snow-plow to come by and follow it.
That way she would not get stuck in a snow drift.
This made her feel much better and sure enough in a little while a snow-plow
 went by and she started to follow it.
As she followed the snow-plow she was feeling very smug as they continued
 and she was not having any problem with the blizzard conditions.
After an hour had passed,
she was somewhat surprised when the snow-plow stopped
and the driver got out and came back to her car
 and signaled for her to roll down her window.
The snow-plow driver wanted to know if she was alright,
 as she had been following him for a long time.
She said that she was fine and told him of her daddy's advice
to follow a snow-plow when caught in a blizzard.
The driver replied that it was OK with him
 and she could continue if she wanted,
 but he was done with the Wal-Mart parking lot,
and was going over to Sears next.


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Very clever video



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I live in Oklahoma and lived in Texas before that.
People think that down here in the south
we are all watchin rasslin,
 spottin UFOs and havin sex with our relatives.
That isn't true.
I've never seen a UFO.






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video

thanks Jayne M



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Tim Conway and Carol Burnett




thanks Kitty L






Walter arrived at his office late one morning
 and was greeted with giggles from the pretty young receptionist.
 "What are you laughing at?" asked Walter.
"There's a big black smudge on your face," said the girl.
"Oh, that!" said Walter.
 "That's easy to explain. I saw my wife off on a month's vacation this morning.
 I took her to the train station and kissed her good-bye."
"But what about the smudge?"
"As soon as she got on board,
 I ran up and kissed the engine, too."








PHILS PHILOSOPHY

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Disclaimer
All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact Phil at philco@iinet.net.au.




Saturday, February 18, 2012


Image by FlamingText.com







486

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Whitney Houston






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Australian Politics
more floods in Queensland....again

 

Refugees



lol!!


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better late than never!!!

"I Love you



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One day a mechanic was working late under a car
and some brake fluid dripped into his mouth.
“Wow! That stuff isn’t too bad tasting” he thought.
 Next day he told his buddy about tasting the brake fluid.
“Not bad,” he said. “Think I’ll have a little more today.”
His friend got a little concerned but didn’t say anything.
 Next day he told about drinking a cup full of the brake fluid.
“Great stuff! Think I’ll have some more today.” And so he did.
A few days later he was up to a bottle a day, and told his friend
“This brake fluid is really great stuff.”
His friend was now really worried.
 “You know that brake fluid is poison and really bad for you
. You better stop drinking that stuff.”
“Hey, no problem,” he said, “I can stop any time.”




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Prank finds a hero


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How People perceive me !!!













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It was their fifth anniversary,
 and Nina and Lloyd had just returned from the movies.
 Nina was feeling quite romantic.
"Will you love me when my hair has turned to silver?" she crooned.
"Why not?" Lloyd grunted.
 "Didn't I love you through the four other shades -- so far


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Animal misconceptions

Those Funny Animals






Bear Pole Dancing





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CATS

thanks Toni S
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Is this a Wal- Mart pictue!!!




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Can you find the Face?????




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Not What you think!!!






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Chinese Fast Food Restaurants








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It had been a quiet night at the local bar so far, but then the door was thrown open
and an interstate highway strode in.
"I'm an interstate highway," he declared.
"I stretch from coast to coast and have at least four lanes,
 shoulders and a median almost my entire length.
 I have the highest speed limit of any highway. I'm the best of the highways,
 and I'm afraid of no highway and no road."
He then strode up to the bar, ordered a beer,
 and began drinking it while looking around.
A short time later, a four-lane highway came in,
went to the end of the bar, and ordered a beer.
 The interstate looked him over and walked over to him.
 "I'm an interstate highway," he declared.
 "I stretch from coast to coast and have at least four lanes, shoulders,
 and a median almost my entire length.
 I have the highest speed limit of any highway.
I'm the best of the highways, and I'm not afraid of you."
The four-lane highway said, "I agree that you're the best.
I don't want any trouble with you. Let me buy you a beer," and he did.
They drank their beers and discussed their engineering specifications.
After a half hour, the door opened again and a two-lane road came in,
 went to the other end of the bar, and ordered a beer.
 The interstate looked him over and told the four-lane highway
that he had to take care of the new arrival.
 He walked over to the two-lane road and said,
"I'm an interstate highway. I stretch from coast to coast and have at least four lanes,
 shoulders, and a median almost my entire length.
 I have the highest speed limit of any highway.
 I'm the best of the highways, and I'm not afraid of you."
The two-lane road quivered a bit and said,
 "You're absolutely right. You are the best of the highways.
 I'm just a lowly two-lane road. I don't want any trouble.
 Can I buy beers for you and the four-lane highway?"
The interstate motioned the four-lane highway to come over.
The two-lane road bought beers for each of them,
 and the three drank their beers
and discussed the merits of various paving materials.
After another half hour, the door opened again
and a strip of asphalt about eight feet wide came in.
The interstate highway ducked behind the bar and hid their quivering quietly.
 The bartender was shocked.
After serving the asphalt strip, he walked over to where the interstate was hiding
. "I watched you stand up to the four-lane highway and the two-lane road.
 You said you weren't afraid of any highway or road.
 Why are you hiding from that little asphalt strip?"
The interstate replied quietly, "It's true that I'm not afraid of any highway or road.
 but he's a cycle path!"







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A Glass of Red



thanks Toni S




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thanks Steve McV

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Sexy and I know it
amazing!!



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What became of them in later life















thanks Kitty L




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thanks Jayne M
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Card Ad


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thanks Toni S





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SOME MORE FUNNY SIGNS

















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Old Men chasing the Lady

thanks Toni S



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Transport Fails


















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PHILS PHILOSOPHY



Disclaimer
All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact Phil at philco@iinet.net.au.