Today is May 4th
Today "she who must be obeyed" is due back from Thailand
About time ,as there is plenty of housework to be done
This is a very clever animation from Pixar
For the Birds
Generation Y
The Silent generation, people born before 1945.
The Baby Boomers, people born between 1945 and 1961.
Generation X, people born between 1962 and 1976.
Generation Y, people born between 1977 and 1989.
Why do we call the last generation Y?
I did not know, but a caricaturist explains it eloquently below.
stolen from
Shelleys Snippets
There were three generals, one Chinese, an Iraqi, and a French.
They were bragging about how good each of their armies were.
The Chinaman said, "My army would kill themselves for their country!"
Then he put a platoon in a little room and told them,
"When this feather hits the floor I want all of you to shoot yourselves!"
He then went outside the room and five seconds later there were numerous gunshots and everyone in the room was dead.
Next came the Turkish General and he said the same thing to one of his platoons.
About seven seconds later they heard gunshots and once again everyone was dead.
Finally came the French and he did the same to his platoon.
Several seconds past and there were no gunshots.
They decided to wait a little longer.
Then several more seconds past and still no gunshots.
Finally they went in and the whole French platoon was on the floor blowing
under the feather to keep it up.
One way to get the beer to the resort
For the golfer out there
Intimidate all those with those little buggys
Two drunks stumble out of a pub in Ireland at about 4:00 in the morning.
They stagger to the nearest lamppost and lean against it when along comes a policeman.
The first drunk pipes up, "Excuse me, ossifer, but I wonder could you tell
me if the last bus to Dublin has left yet."
To which the policeman replies
"Of course it has. It's 4:00 in the morning."
The second drunk then weighs in and says,
"Sorry, sir, but I wonder if the last bus to Galway has left yet."
The officer again replies "Of course it has. It's 4:00 in the morning."
The first drunk then starts up again and asks,
"Could you tell me please, ossifer, has the last bus to Cork gone yet."
The policeman is really irritated now so he shouts,
"It's 4am, all the bloody buses have gone!"
And with that the first drunk turns to his friend and says,
"Ok, Mick, we can cross the road now."
The Lumber Jack Song ...Eric Idle and Monty Python
There was once a king of a wealthy island nation.
The king could have built a large palace on the island.
However, tradition dictated that he live in a modest grass hut
like the island's other inhabitants.
Wanting to enjoy his wealth, he called in engineers.
They suggested that he build an elaborate throne.
They designed the throne, along with a series of ropes and levers to raise and lower it.
That way, he could lift it up to the top of his hut when not in use,
leaving more room for other activities.
The king was happy for a few months.
But soon the ropes frayed and the throne tumbled down and shattered.
This goes to prove that ...
... people who live in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones.
Video Dedication
Last blog was a dedication to Ian Hall out in the wheatbelt
Ian is a Credence fan
However Ian's wife Margaret loves classical music
Just to show that I am not a musical cretin altogether,
this is for Margaret
From the BBC show...Strictly come Dancing
The Blue Danube [Waltz]
Todays CARTOONS [Misc]
Needing gas, they pull over.
Hillary excuses herself to go to the ladies’ room.
After filling the tank, Bill goes looking for Hillary and is surprised
to see her talking animatedly with the gas station attendant.
Stunned, he watches as she gives the attendant a big hug and a kiss.
“What was that all about?” Bill asks huffily when she returns to the car.
“Oh,” explains Hillary, “I went to high school with that guy.
In fact, I think I even dated him at one time.
We were catching up on old times.”
“Well,” observes Bill, “I guess if you had married him, you’d be pumping gas today!”
“Oh no, Bill,” says Hillary,
“If I had married him, he’d have been the President of the United States!”
Way to go.. Granny!!
Way to go.. Granny!!
A man went to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis.
According to the nurse attending,
the patient’s girlfriend found the ring in his pants pocket
and she got so mad at him,
she used petroleum jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep.
I don’t know what’s worse:
1) Having your girl friend find out you’re married.
2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.
3) Or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring
Lee Kernaghan....The Boys from the Bush
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