Saturday, October 23, 2010

369


It's October
and almost Xmas
only 63 days
xmas no chaser
------



-----


This is Cool
click on link

----------------------------


Shortly after arriving at the University of Washington,

I joined some new friends on a trip to nearby Vancouver, British Columbia.

It was my very first trip outside the United States.

At the border, a guard asked how long we would stay in Canada.

Knowing it would be after midnight when we returned, I asked,

"How late will we be able to get back across the border?"

"Any time, Ma'am," the guard said.

"We never close Canada!"






--------------------------------

Elmo


---------


------------------------------

A fellow walks into a pub near Buckingham Palace in London,
sits down, and says,
"Give me a beer. I've had a rough day at work."
And the bartender says, "Oh? What do you do?"
The guy says, "I take care of the corgis --
you know, the dogs the royal family owns."
The bartender asks, "Tough job, huh?"
The guy says, "Yeah. All that inbreeding has led
to low intelligence and bad temperaments.
And the dogs aren't too smart, either." --
Stan Kegel


-----------------------------



Those Funny Animals









---------------










------------------
A couple of blondes are on a large cruise ship.
“It’s awfully quiet on deck tonight,” the first blonde says.
“Everyone must be watching the band,” the second blonde replies.
“There isn’t a band playing tonight,” the first blonde says.
“Yes there is,” the second blonde says.
“I just heard someone shout, ‘A band on ship!’



-------------------





SOMETHING AUSSIE

Actually today it's something Kiwi
Came across this and have always loved this song
There are a couple of good versions on youtube
But this is the one I like





--------------------


A woman, while touring a small South American country called Ecuador
was shown a bullfight.
The guide told her, "Señorita, this is our number one sport."
The horrified woman said,
"Isn't that revolting!"
"No, Señorita," the guide replied,
"that's our number two sport."


-------------------------


TILL DEATH DO US PART












------------------

Two guys were walking down the street one day
when they came across a small pair of gym shorts on the ground.
They decided to put a sign up on the church bulletin board
so the rightful owner could claim them.
The first one starts to write out the sign,
"FOUND: one pair ofboys gym shorts..."
"Hold on," says the second,
"Those are girls gym shorts."
"No they're not," says the first,
"They're boys shorts!"
The second grabs them from him and takes a closer look,
"No, no... Definitely girls gym shorts!"
The two of them are inspecting the shorts in turns and arguing.
"Boys shorts!",
"No, girls shorts!",
"Definitely boys shorts!"...
. and so on
.The local priest is walking past as the two men argue
and can't help but ask them what the commotion is all about.
The first guy tells the priest, and asks him if he could sort out the argument.
The priest takes the shorts, has a good long sniff,
and after pondering for a few moments he looks at the two men and says:
"Definitely boys shorts!.........
but not from my parish!"


-------------------------------



How to wash your car with only one bucket of water




-------------------------



thanks Josie J

------------------------

Blast from the Past



-----------------------------



In San Antonio there is a display of colourful outhouses at present in a local park




thanks Liz Z

So, I thought what about some "colourful" Aussiie Dunny's





this one is in Tasmania









-----------------------


Two gay men decide to have a baby.
They mix their sperm together and have
a surrogate mother artificially inseminated with it
.When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital.
A dozen babies are in the ward,
eleven of whom are crying and screaming.
Over in the corner, one baby is smiling serenely
.A nurse comes by, and to the delight of the gay fathers,
she points out the happy child as theirs.
"Isn't it wonderful?" one gay says to the other."
All these unhappy babies .... and yet our baby is so happy.
This just proves the superiority of gay love!"
The nurse says, "Oh sure, he's happy now,
but just watch what happens when I pull the thermometer out of his ass !"

-----------------------

"DOWN MEMORY LANE"



-----------------------------------


------------------------------------

PHILS PHILOSOPHY





but I leave you with




-----------------------


Disclaimer
All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact Phil at philco@iinet.net.au.



No comments: