Saturday, January 5, 2013






Image by FlamingText.com





528


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Land fill Harmonic






 the new year



Christmas was over, so Rudolph had a chance to do something
he had wanted to do for a long time.
 He made an appointment with a plastic surgeon
because he was so sensitive about his looks.
However, it wasn’t his glowing proboscis that he wanted changed.
He was proud of his nose and the help he had given Santa because of it.
No, he was sensitive about his long ears which were much more prominent
 than the ears of the average reindeer.
So one week after Christmas, he underwent reconstructive surgery,
 and since that time, January 1st has been celebrated as
… New Ears Day.








 take a train ride to 2013
Just wait for the pictures to come on and have your sound on.
 This is really beautiful.
Enjoy!!!


Thanks Karl Z


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Five Signs You're at a Lame New Year's Eve Party..........
  
1. The party hats look suspiciously like stolen traffic cones.

2.  There's a Happy 2009 sticker on the packet of shrimp I've been eating all night.

3.  It's January 6th.

4.  Prison regulations require lights out at 10:00 p.m.

5.  The champagne tastes suspiciously like apple juice mixed with Alka Seltzer.






Seasons Gweetings





 



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Those Funny Animals













Cat Resolutions







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The latest buzz from the viral media frontier is this heartwarming photo
of a baby grabbing a doctor's finger while still inside the mother's womb.
Since being posted to the mother's Facebook page earlier in December,
 the image has accumulated more than 6,900 likes
 and 3,700 shares in about two weeks.







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After years of being blasted into a net,
the human cannonball went to the circus owner
 and told him he was going to retire.
"But you can't!" shouted the cigar-chomping boss,
"Where am I going to find a man of your caliber?"
As it turned out, the human cannonball who replaced him
was hired and fired the same night.









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Golf


This is a photo from a golf course after being struck by lightning.
The fascinating fractal pattern you see on the fairway
is known as a Lichtenberg figure,
 which are branching electrical discharges.
For those golf addicts who always try and get one more hole
 in before vacating the course during a thunderstorm
, let this image serve as a warning why that may not be the best idea.








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The World in Two Minutes
Italy








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Bacon!!!!














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Dad's pager went off, summoning him to the hospital,
 where he is an anesthetist.
  As he raced toward the hospital, a patrol car sped up behind him
-- lights were flashing.

Dad hung his stethoscope out the window,
 to signal that he was on an emergency call.
Within seconds, came the police officer's hand in response,
 dangling a pair of handcuffs out the window.







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Some rare photographs

"Get the hell out of my race and give me those numbers."

After realizing a woman was running Boston marathon organizer Jock Semple

went after Kathrine Switzer.

 Other runners blocked him and she went on to finish the race. 1967.



The only known photograph of an African American Union soldier

with his family. c1863-65



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 A Native American looks down at a newly-completed section
 of the transcontinental railroad. Nevada , about 1868







Jewish refugees, approaching allied soldiers, become

aware that they have just been liberated, April, 1945









Martin Luther King Jr removing a burned cross from his front yard

with his son at his side. Atlanta Ga 1960








9 kings featured in one photo (Windsor Castle, 20 May 1910)









Johnny Cash performing for prisoners at Folsom Prison – Jan. 13th 1968

 Thanks Kitty L




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this video I have posted before
but here it is again to enjoy












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It's just a modern world we live in





The residents of Silicon Valley are more confused than usual
after a billboard campaign by the National Multiple Sclerosis Society of America
used this line in an ad slogan:  "MS:  It's not a software company,"
exploiting the fame of a certain company to draw attention
to an altogether worthier cause.     

    Requests to comment on the campaign have been met
by a surly silence by Microsoft,
 which doesn't relish the association of ideas
but is painfully aware that it can't afford to appear insensitive
over such an issue. 




    Seasoned information technology professionals
will have no trouble telling the two MS's apart: 
 One is a debilitating and surprisingly widespread affliction
that renders the sufferer barely able to perform 

the simplest task. 
The other is a disease,














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Wins...2012


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A guy applied for a job advertised in the paper for a Zoo Keeper
and was asked to come in for an interview.
The interviewer invited the guy into his office,
 asked him to take a seat and sat down behind his desk to begin the interview.
 


"So, do you have any experience in this field?"
 the interviewer asked.
"Oh, yes. I am more than qualified for this position,"
the guy replied.
"And what type of experience do you have then?"
 the interviewer asked.
"I was raised in the Mahale Mountains in Tanzania by monkeys,"
 the guy replied.
The interviewer was convinced he had a real nut case
 here but was interested in hearing his story anyway
. Peering over the rim of his glasses he asked,
"Ah yeah, what did you say your name was again?"
"Jim...Jim Pan-Zee."











    Two young men were out in the woods on a camping trip,
 when they came upon this great trout brook.
They stayed there all day, enjoying the fishing, which was super.
    At the end of the day,
knowing that they would be graduating from college soon,
they vowed that they would meet in twenty years
 at the same place and renew the experience.
    Twenty years later, they met and traveled to a spot
near where they had been years before. 
 They walked into the woods, and before long, came upon a brook. 
 One of the men said to the other, "This is the place!".
    The other replied, "No, it's not!"
    The first man said,
"Yes, I do recognize the clover growing on the bank on the other side."
    To which the other man replied,
 "Silly, you can't tell a brook by it's clover."





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We haven't visited Walmart for awhile









thanks Jayne M








Tim decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend.
One evening, after the honeymoon,
he was assembling some loads for an upcoming hunt.
His wife was standing there at the bench watching him.
After along period of silence she finally speaks.
 "Honey, I've been thinking, now that we are married
I think it's time you quit hunting, shooting, hand-loading, and fishing.
 Maybe you should sell your guns and boat."
Tim gets this horrified look on his face.
She says, "Darling, what's wrong?"
”There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife.”
"Ex wife!" she screams,
 "I didn't know you were married before!"
”I wasn't!“






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POSTERS













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Dance like nobodys watching
 







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Blonde's
Doctor!" the blonde patient cried.
 "I keep seeing spots!"

The doctor scratched his head, paused for a moment,

 and asked her,
 "Why have you come to me?
Have you seen an opthamologist?"
"No," said the blonde.
 "Just spots."
 
 



I met a blonde in a bar last night and I asked,
 “What’s your name?”
“It’s K,” she replied.
“That’s sexy,” I said,
 “What’s it short for?”
She smiled and answered,
 “So I can spell it.”

 


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It must be cold there!!





Victor Borge






more rare photos
 from World War 2



 

Snow on deck. USS Philippine Sea North Pacific 1945

 













German 280mm K5 firing

 





































Thanks Ray S

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Italian Car Pool







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This Weeks Signs








































A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather
 and his badly behaved 3-year-old grandson.
 It's obvious to her that he has his hands full with the
 child screaming for sweets in the sweet aisle,
 biscuits in the biscuit aisle,
 and for fruit, cereal and pop in the other aisles.
 Meanwhile, Granddad is working his way around,
saying in a controlled voice,
 "Easy, William, we won't be long, easy, boy."
 Another outburst, and she hears the granddad calmly say,
"It's okay, William, just a couple more minutes
 and we'll be out of here. Hang in there, boy."
At the checkout, the little terror is throwing items out of the cart,
 and Granddad says again in a controlled voice,
 "William, William, relax buddy, don't get upset.
We'll be home in five minutes, stay cool, William."
Very impressed, the woman goes outside
where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car.
She says to the elderly gentleman,
"It's none of my business, but you were amazing in there.
 I don't know how you did it.
That whole time, you kept your composure,
 and no matter how loud and disruptive he got,
you just calmly kept saying things would be okay.
William is very lucky to have you as his grandpa.."
"Thanks," says the grandfather,
 "but I'm William... the little sh*t's name is Kevin."

 


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PHILS PHILOSOPHY


Disclaimer
All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site
are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact Phil at philco@iinet.net.au.

 





3 comments:

Sandee said...

Oh the Wal*Mart folks. I don't shop in Wal*Mart. Refuse to enter their doors. It's like traveling to the Outer Limits.

Stole the kitty picture with the too small basket. Perfect for Feline Friday. I gave you credit.

Have a terrific day. :)

toni said...

The in utero surgery brought back lots of memories. My daughter had in utero surgery when she was 20 wks pregnant with twins and had twin to twin transfusion syndrome. My identical twin girls are almost 18 mths old. They both wouldn't have survived without the surgery; medicine has made some awesome strides! Oh yes, one of the girls grabbed a surgical instrument - we have the video to prove it. Thanks for the memories, Phil!

HUGS,
toni

Jerry E Beuterbaugh said...

"Phils Phun" has been included in the A Sunday Drive for this week. Be assured that I hope this helps to point even more new visitors in your direction.

http://asthecrackerheadcrumbles.blogspot.com/2013/01/a-sunday-drive.html