Saturday, September 6, 2014


613


Western Australia
 Red Bluff  ...  Kalbarri




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Papua New Guinea's Tavurvur 
Volcano Eruption





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Places you wish you were









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Those Funny Animals



















Slippery Squirrel




















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Mutant Giant Spider Dog





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Facts about Fast Food









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Dream Rangers






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Most bar tenders live a relatively happy life.
 They are constantly meeting new friends
 and are always engaged in some form of interesting conversation
. People pay top dollar for their unique services
 and they bring happiness to most patrons.

The most pleasant times are those in which 
the bartender is able to join the patrons for a few drinks
. And the enjoyment is greatly increased when 
he purchases drinks for the house. 
It is at these times that the bartender finds he has more friends
 than he could ever imagine.
 And each and every one of them is more than happy
 to share in his generosity.

It is therefore sad when closing time comes
 and it becomes necessary to clean the bar
 in preparation for the next day's business
. It is then that all of these fair weather friends disappear. 


Still, most bartenders understand this quirk
 of casual human behavior and have learned to accept it.
 For it is said:
 "Quaff and the world quaffs with you; 
sweep and you sweep alone."











The Vikings were among the most intrepid explorers of all time. 

While the United States celebrates the exploits
 of Christopher Columbus,
 little attention is paid to Leif Erikson,
 Erik the Red, and other northern explorers 
who sailed the treacherous North Atlantic in small boats.
 One of Leif Erikson's voyages found him
 sailing from Scandinavia past Iceland, Greenland,
 and into what is now Canada. 
Of course in those days, such voyages
 took many, many months, even years.

Unbeknownst to the Norse government
 officials back in Europe,
 Erikson and the other Vikings had set up villages 
and weren't to return for several years.
 Knowing the dangers of the North Atlantic,
 and realizing that there was little hope of Erikson
 and his fellow brave souls ever returning
 from their voyage,
 the man responsible for keeping track of the number of citizens
 in Erikson's home town,
 forgot about him.

When Leif and the boys returned
 and discovered that they were no longer part 
of the population count, they were irate
. Erikson complained to the head magistrate. 

The magistrate apologized 
and was very embarrassed.
 He could only say,
"I'm sorry, but I must have taken Leif off my census."

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What ever will be.......  will be






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Seniors having fun


















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An amazing street performer in Taipei
 This is street performing at its best.
 Can't imagine the training it took to create this piece of moving body art.



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Posters








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 International Space Station
 Expedition 38 Earth Observations





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Amazing Humans













Scary Humans








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Funny Russian Road Rage








  Odds and Ends
















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How the sun sees you





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USELESS INFORMATION










Men and Women










TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
10. Cats' facial expressions.
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
7. Fat clothes.
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white,
 and eggshell.
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
3. Eyelash curlers.
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

AND,
 the Number One thing only women understand:

1. OTHER WOMEN









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Wall's Ice Cream - Goodbye Serious Cops

Being a police officer is serious business 
that often involves stressful situations for both the police
 and people they stop especially if you get pulled
 over for a traffic violation like DWIC. 







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Late one Friday night, a policeman in a patrol car 
spotted a man driving very erratically 
through the streets of Dublin.

They pulled the man over and asked him
 if he had been drinking that evening.

"Aye, so I have. It's Friday, you know,
 so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had 

six or seven pints.


And then there was something called "Happy Hour"
 and they served these mar-gar-itos which 

are quite good. 
I had four or five of those.


Then I had to drive me friend Mike home 
and of course I had to go in 

for a couple of Guiness -
 couldn't be rude, ye know.


Then I stopped on the way home
 to get another bottle for later..." 

Then, the man fumbled around in his coat
 until he located his bottle of whiskey,
 which he held up for inspection.


The officer sighed, and said,
 "Sir, I'm afraid I'll need you to step out of the ca
 and take a breathalyzer test."

The man said, 
"Why? Don't ye believe me?!"




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bad parenting








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Two Texans are sitting on a plane from Dallas
 and an old Jewish man is sitting between them. 
The first Texan says,
"My name is Roger. I own 250,000 acres.
 I have 1,000 head of cattle
 and they call my place The Jolly Roger."
The second Texan says, 
"My name is John. I own 350,000 acres.
 I have 5,000 head of cattle 
and they call my place Big John's."
They both look down at the little old Jewish man who says,
 "My name is Irving and I own only 300 acres."
Roger looks down at him and says,
 "300 Acres? 
What do you raise?"
"Nothing," says Irving.
"Well then, what do you call it?"
 asked John.

"Downtown Dallas." he replied





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this weeks signs
















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The Christmas rush was finally over
 and Santa all the reindeer were resting.
 Rudolph was happy lo have a chance to do something
 that had been on his mind for many years.
 Although some would believe it had something
 to do with his nose,
 his real concern had something to do with his ears.

He made an appointment with a plastic surgeon
 and explained to the doctor that he was sensitive
 about how he looked and his ears needed work.
 They were so long that they stood out like a sore thumb
 when he was around the other deer.
 They embarrassed him and he wanted them trimmed.
 The doctor agreed and,
 after the brief recovery period, 
Rudolph returned to his herd 
and proudly held his head and new ears high.

The others thought he looked quite dandy
 and they voted to honor him with his own special day. 
And since that time,
 January 1st has been celebrated as New Ears Day.



Phils Philosophy


Disclaimer

All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site

are understood to be in the public domain.
If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,
please contact Phil at philco@iinet.net.au.


1 comment:

Sandee said...

Yikes on the volcano. Way cool to be that close too.

Places I wish I were. Yep on all of them.

That rock squirrel was very entertaining.

The spider dog? Yikes. Double yikes. That would have scared me to pieces. Wait...it did.

Dream Rangers. Wow.

The fast food facts. Wow. That was very, very powerful.

What ever will be... will be. Loved it and so very true. Many paths and many so difficult.

Seniors have fun. As we should. I know I do.

The moving body art? Wow. that was amazing.

The space station. Now that was awesome and then some.

The amazing humans. We need to hear more about these folks and less about the idiots in Hollyweird. I'm just saying.

Scary human beings? They are surely all Walmart shoppers.

The Russian road rage. Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha. I wasn't expecting that.

How the sun sees you. Wow.

Useless information. Very interesting though.

Waiting for my wife to get ready. Bwahahahahahahahaha.

Bad parenting. Frightening actually.

If your dog does a poo, please put it in the litter bin. Bwahahahahahahahaha. Poor dog.

Be kind to everything that lives. The very best of all you've posted today Phil.

Have a fabulous weekend. :)