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It seems so long since the last post
Hope you are all getting into the swing of Xmas
More of a Xmas flavour today
Enjoy

Another Xmas song for you to singalong to

Jim Reeves.....Silver Bells

City sidewalk,
busy sidewalks
dressed in holiday style.
In the air there'sa feeling of Christmas.
Children laughing, people passing,
meeting smile after smile,
And on every street corner you'll hear:
Silver bells, silver bells,
It's Christmas time in the city.
Ring-a-ling, hear them ring,
soon it will be Christmas day.
City street lights,even stop lights,
blink a bright red and green,
As the shoppers rush home with their treasures.
Hear the snow crunch,
see the kids bunch,
This is Santa's big scene,
And above all this bustle you'll hear:
Silver bells, silver bells,
It's Christmas time in the city.
Ring-a-ling, hear them ring,
soon it will be Christmas day.

For those readers in others countries here is a light hearted look at
Xmas in Australia


And a funny Xmas video
Larry the Cable Guy sings Xmas Carols
warning........may offend some





Ican't remember where I got this from, but it's been on my Computer for sometime
An inspirational Christmas story
Pa never had much compassion for the lazy or those who squandered their means
and then never had enough for the necessities.
But for those who were genuinely in need, his heart was as big as all outdoors.
It was from him that I learned the greatest joy in life comes from giving,
not from receiving.
It was Christmas Eve 1881.
I was fifteen years old and feeling like the world had caved in on me because there
just hadn't been enough money to buy me the rifle that I'd wanted for Christmas.
We did the chores early that night for some reason.
I just figured Pa wanted a little extra time so we could read in the Bible.
After supper was over I took my boots off and stretched out in front of the fireplace
and waited for Pa to get down the old Bible.
I was still feeling sorry for myself and, to be honest,
I wasn't in much of a mood to read Scriptures.
But Pa didn't get the Bible; instead he bundled up again and went outside.
I couldn't figure it out because we had already done all the chores.
I didn't worry about it long though; I was too busy wallowing in self-pity.
Soon Pa came back in.
It was a cold clear night out and there was ice in his beard.
"Come on, Matt," he said. "Bundle up good, it's cold out tonight."
I was really upset then.
Not only wasn't I getting the rifle for Christmas, now Pa was dragging me ou t in the cold,
and for no earthly reason that I could see.
We'd already done all the chores, and I couldn't think of anything else that needed doing, especially not on a night like this
But I knew Pa was not very patient at one dragging one's feet
when he'd told them to do something,
so I got up and put my boots back on and got my cap, coat, and mittens.
Ma gave me a mysterious smile as I opened the door to leave the house.
Something was up, but I didn't know what.
Outside, I became even more dismayed.
There in front of the house was the work team, already hitched to the big sled.
Whatever it was we were going to do wasn't going to be a short, quick, little job.
I could tell.
We never hitched up this sled unless we were going to haul a big load.
Pa was already up on the seat, reins in hand.
I reluctantly climbed up beside him.
The cold was already biting at me. I wasn't happy.
When I was on, Pa pulled the sled around the house and stopped in front of the woodshed.
He got off and I followed. "I think we'll put on the high sideboards," he said.
"Here, help me."
The high sideboards!
It had been a bigger job than I wanted to do with just the low sideboards on,
but whatever it was we were going to do would be a lot bigger with the high sideboards on.
After we had exchanged the sideboards,
Pa went into the woodshed and came out with an armload of wood---
the wood I'd spent all summer hauling down from the mountain,
and then all Fall sawing into blocks and splitting.
What was he doing? Finally I said something.
"Pa," I asked, "what are you doing?"
You been by the Widow Jensen's lately?" he asked.
The Widow Jensen lived about two miles down the road.
Her husband had died a year or so before and left her with three children,
the oldest being eight.
Sure, I'd been by, but so what?
"Yeah," I said, "Why?"
"I rode by just today," Pa said.
"Little Jakey was out digging around in the woodpile trying to find a few chips.
They're out of wood, Matt."
That was all he said and then he turned and went back into the woodshed
for another armload of wood.
I followed him.
We loaded the sled so high that I began to wonder if the horses would be able to pull it.
Finally, Pa called a halt to our loading, then we went to the smoke house
and Pa took down a big ham and a side of bacon.
He handed them to me and told me to put them in the sled and wait.
When he returned he was carrying a sack of flour over his right shoulder
and a smaller sack of something in his left hand.
"What's in the little sack?" I asked.
"Shoes. They're out of shoes.
Little Jakey just had gunnysacks wrapped around his feet when he was out in the woodpile
this morning.
I got the children a little candy too.
It just wouldn't be Christmas without a little candy."
We rode the two miles to Widow Jensen's pretty much in silence.
I tried to think through what Pa was doing.
We didn't have much by worldly standards.
Of course, we did have a big woodpile,
though most of what was left now was still in the form of logs that I would have
to saw into blocks and split before we could use it.
We also had meat and flour, so we could spare that,
but I knew we didn't have any money,
so why was Pa buying them shoes and candy?
Really, why was he doing any of this?
Widow Jensen had closer neighbors than us; it shouldn't have been our concern.
We came in from the blind side of the Jensen house
and unloaded the wood as quietly as possible,
and then we took the meat and flour and shoes to the door.
We knocked.
The door opened a crack and a timid voice said, "Who is it?"
"Lucas Miles, Ma'am, and my son, Matt.
Could we come in for a bit?"
Widow Jensen opened the door and let us in.
She had a blanket wrapped around her shoulders.
The children were wrapped in another and were sitting in front of the fireplace
by a very small fire that hardly gave off any heat at all.
Widow Jensen fumbled with a match and finally lit the lamp.
"W e brought you a few things, Ma'am,"
Pa said and set down the sack of flour.
I put the meat on the table.
Then Pa handed her the sack that had the shoes in it.
She opened it hesitantly and took the shoes out one pair at a time.
There was a pair for her and one for each of the children---sturdy shoes,
the best, shoes that would last.
I watched her carefully.
She bit her lower lip to keep it from trembling and then tears filled her eyes
and started running down her cheeks.
She looked up at Pa like she wanted to say something, but it wouldn't come out.
"We brought a load of wood too, Ma'am," Pa said.
He turned to me and said, "Matt, go bring in enough to last awhile.
Let's get that fire up to size and heat this place up."
I wasn't the same person when I went back out to bring in the wood.
I had a big lump in my throat and as much as I hate to admit it,
there were tears in my eyes too.
In my mind I kept seeing those three kids huddled around the fireplace
and the ir mother standing there with tears running down her cheeks
with so much gratitude in her heart that she couldn't speak.
My heart swelled within me and a joy that I'd never known before, filled my soul.
I had given at Christmas many times before,
but never when it had made so much difference.
I could see we were literally saving the lives of these people.
I soon had the fire blazing and everyone's spirits soared.
The kids started giggling when Pa handed them each a piece of candy
and Widow Jensen looked on with a smile that probably
hadn't crossed her face for a long time.
She finally turned to us. "God bless you," she said.
"I know the Lord has sent you.
The children and I have been praying that he would send one of his angels to spare us.
"In spite of myself, the lump returned to my throat and the tears welled up in my eyes again.
I'd never thought of Pa in those exact terms before,
but after Widow Jensen mentioned it I could see that it was probably true.
I was sure that a better man than Pa had never walked the earth.
I started remembering all the times he had gone out of his way for Ma and me,
and many others.
The list seemed endless as I thought on it.
Pa insisted that everyone try on the shoes before we left.
I was amazed when they all fit and I wondered how he had known what sizes to get.
Then I guessed that if he was on an errand for the Lord that the Lord
would make sure he got the right sizes.
Tears were running down Widow Jensen's face again when we stood up to leave.
Pa took each of the kids in his big arms and gave them a hug.
They clung to him and didn't want us to go.
I could see that they missed their Pa, and I was glad that I still had mine.
At the door Pa turned to Widow Jensen and said,
"The Mrs. wanted me to invite you and the children over for Christmas dinner tomorrow.
The turkey will be more than the three of us can eat,
and a man can get cantankerous if he has to eat turkey for too many meals.
We'll be by to get you about eleven.
It'll be nice to have some little ones around again.
Matt, here, hasn't been little for quite a spell."
I was the youngest.
My two brothers and two sisters had all married and had moved away.
Widow Jensen nodded and said,
"Thank you, Brother Miles. I don't have to say,
"'May the Lord bless you,' I know for certain that He will."
Out on the sled I felt a warmth that came from deep within and
I didn't even notice the cold.
When we had gone a ways, Pa turned to me and said,
"Matt, I want you to know something.
Your ma and me have been tucking a little money away here and
there all year so we could buy that rifle for you,
but we didn't have quite enough.
Then yesterday a man who owed me a little money from years back came
by to make things square.
Your ma and me were real excited, thinking that now we could get you that rifle,
and I started into town this morning to do just that.
But on the way I saw little Jakey out scratching in th e woodpile
with his feet wrapped in those gunnysacks and I knew what I had to do.
Son, I spent the money for shoes and a little candy for those children.
I hope you understand."
I understood, and my eyes became wet with tears again.
I understood very well, and I was so glad Pa had done it.
Now the rifle seemed very low on my list of priorities.
Pa had given me a lot more.
He had given me the look on Widow Jensen's face
and the radiant smiles of her three children.
For the rest of my life, whenever I saw any of the Jensens,
or split a block of wood,
I remembered, and remembering brought back that same joy
I felt riding home beside Pa that night.
Pa had given me much more than a rifle that night;
he had given me the best Christmas of my life.

Don't be too busy this Christmas




Some Xmas Cartoons

Mrs. Santa Claus was seeking a divorce from an incredulous judge

who asked her to explain her marital problems.

""It's that happy, jolly stuff, all year long,"" she said.

""It drives me crazy!""

""All year? Why, I thought Santa's work was only in the winter,"" said the judge.

""Sure, but in summer he takes up gardening,"

" Mrs. Santa replied,

""and then it's hoe, hoe, hoe all over again!"""

-----------------------------------------------------

.One beautiful December evening Huan Cho

and his girlfriend JungLee was sitting by the side of the ocean.

It was a romantic full moon, when Huan Cho said

"Hey baby, how about playing Weeweechu."

"Oh no, not now, lets look at the moon" said Jung Lee.

"Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I play Weeweechu. I love you

and it's the perfect time," Huan Cho begged.

"But I rather just hold your hand and watch the moon."

"Please Jung Lee, just once play Weeweechu with me."

Jung Lee looked at Huan Chi and said,

"OK, we'll play Weeweechu."....

Huan Cho grabbed his guitar and both sang...

."Weeweechu a melly Chlistmas,

Weeweechu a melly Chlistmas, Weeweechu a melly Chlistmas,

and a happy New Year."

thanks Joan Andony]

---------------------------------------

Farmer Jones lives with his tame bear in the remote country with only dirt access roads.

His tame bear had been naughty that day so he put him in the barn

and said "you stay here until you learn how to behaveyourself".

Shortly afterwards it begin to rain (a real heavy downpour).

About an hour later a travelling salesman got stuck in the mud

and asked the Farmer for a place to stay.

The Farmer told him he didn't have room in the house, however he could stay in the barn.

He told the salesman there were no lights in the barn and his tame bear was in the barn.

The Farmer said the bear would not bother him.

Thesalesman went to the barn.

Later another travelling salesman got stuck in the mud and the Farmer told him

about the barn-no lights and the tame bear.

Salesmen left for barn

.One hour later a woman got stuck in the mud and approached the Farmer.

He told her about the barn and mentioned the two travelling salesmen

(he was so concerned about the salesmen he forgot to mention thebear).

The woman said I can take care of myself and left for the barn.

Two hours later the Farmer was awakened by heavy knocking at the door.

When opening the door the woman was standing there with her clothes torn and rumpled.

The Farmer said good heavens what happened to you?.

The woman replied I give up on human nature,

the first guy gave me forty dollars,

the second guy gave me fiftydollars,

but that cheap bastard in the fur coat never even said thanks.

--------------

Anyone for an icy cold frozen bear

SOME SCOTTISH JOKES

Scots traditionally marry on February 29, goes the joke,

so that they only need to celebrate their anniversary once every four years.

How can you tell that the trawler coming to the harbour is from Scotland?

There are no seagulls in its wake.

"I've received some photos from my Scottish pen pal?"

"What do they look like?"

"Don't know. Have to get them developed first."

Two Scots fall down a crevasse while in the mountains.

The mountain watch is alerted, and the rescue team appears.

"Hello, we're from the Red Cross," one rescuer says.

The reply comes from below, "You're getting no donations from us."


Madness

An Irish joke

Irish they were and drunk for sure,

and they sat in the corner of Mulligan's newly refurbished bar.

Across the wall opposite was a huge mirror,

fourteen feet long and stretching from floor to ceiling.

Glancing around the room Pat suddenly spotted their reflection in the mirror.

'Mick, Mick,' he whispered.

'Don't look now but there's two fellas over there the image of us!'

'In the name of God,' said Mick, spotting the reflection.

'They're wearing identical clothes and everything.'

'That does it,' said Pat.

'I'm going to buy them a drink.'

But as Pat started to rise from his seat,

Mick said, 'Sit down Pat one of them's coming over!'


McDonalds in Mexico

For the ladies

Joan Andony [thanks Joan] sent me these images

I'll leave you to work it out for yourself

A Kiwi and an Aussie were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer.

After a while the Aussie says to the Kiwi,

"If I was to sneak over to your house and shag your wife while you were off fishing,

and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us related?"

"The Kiwi crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head,

and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question.

Finally, he says,

"Well, I don't know about being related, but it would make us even."
[stolen from Big shot Bob in Texas]

MUSLIM SEX

A man goes into a porn shop and asks for an inflatable sex doll.

"Certainly, sir" says the proprietor

" Would you like a Christian one or a Muslim one?"

"What's the difference?" says the man

"Well", replies the proprietor, "the Muslim one blows herself up"


Man of the Year ........ second choice

For all those politically correct people who want to change everything about
Christmas and insist that we don’t say anything offensive to upset others
I say, let 'em wash my mouth with a bar of Lifebuoy soap!

I'll put up a Christmas tree and wish everyone a Merry Christmas.

I'll go Christmas shopping and buy Christmas gifts.

I'll send Christmas cards.

I'll sing Christmas carols and play Christmas music in my car.

...And I'll put up Christmas posts.

What are they gonna do - censor my blog?
[Pinched these sentiments from my friend Hale McKay at “It occurred to me”]

It was 27 years ago on December 8, 1980,

that former Beatle, songwriter, singer, musician, graphic artist, author and peace activist

John Lennon was shot four times in the back by Mark Chapman as he entered the Dakota,

his luxury apartment building on Manhattan's Upper West Side,

opposite Central Park, at 23.00 local time.

Chapman said he had heard voices in his head telling him to kill the world-famous musician.

He pleaded guilty to gunning down JL and is currently serving life in Attica .

In his solo career, Lennon wrote and recorded "Imagine" ,

an authentic hymn to peace and fraternity,

and one of my favourite songs ever.

thanks to Cochise at 'Apache'

JOHN LENNON..........IMAGINE

SOME PERVERSE WISDOM FROM OSCAR WILDE

Discontent is the first step in the progress of a man or nation.

A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.

If you don't get everything that you want, think of the things you don't get that you don't want.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train.

In this world there are only two tragedies: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.

I see when men love women they give but a little of their lives

but women when they love give everything.

None of us can stand other people who have the same faults as ourselves.

Put your talent into your work, but your genius into your life.

A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.

Women are meant to be loved, not understood.

The Stubby Symphony

Thanks to Stevie Boy...V1 for this

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