Sunday, March 23, 2008

G'day one and All
Happy Easter to you
If you are having the whole Easter weekend off, then good luck to you
Its Easter Sunday , here in the West
Grandkids everywhere [as well as chocolate galore]

Easter Bunny Boogie

Dear Friends and readers,
I am happy to inform you all that I have completed my MBA Degree.

I am sorry if you got surprised by knowing,
about my part time MBA (Operations), all of a sudden.
I was a bit embarrassed about telling this to all of you.
Actually I was trying for it since long time.

I used to work very hard for it late nights.
I’m glad that finally it all turned out well.
I plan to pursue my studies in this regard further.
I have scanned the certificate and pasted below so that you can have a look.
Need all your wishes for my further studies.
Thank you my friends…

Throughout the ages, men have been trying to unlock the mystery
as to why their wives who accepted them as they were before they got married,
subtly and with determination began the quest to change their behaviour
and life-style once their vows were exchanged.
Finally, the riddle was solved.

A social-scientist arrived at a simple and logical conclusion.
When the bride, accompanied by her father, starts to walk slowly down the long aisle,

she sees the altar at the end and hears the choir singing a hymn.
Walking down the aisle, the conditioning process where the brain absorbs these three stimuli: aisle, altar, hymn, begins.
She becomes mesmerized as she continually reinforces these perceptions:
aisle, altar, hymn. . .

aisle, altar, hymn. . .
aisle, altar, hymn. .
and finally, as she stops beside the groom,

the conditioning process is completed.
She looks up at him lovingly, smiling sweetly and thinks
‘I’ll alter him

Todays Cartoons

Two drunks are walking along.
One drunk says to the other, "What a beautiful night... look at the moon."
The other drunk stops and looks at his drunk friend.
"That's not the moon,” he says, “that's the sun."
They started arguing for a while when they came upon another drunk,
so they stopped him.
"Sir, could you please help settle our argument?
Tell us what that thing is up in the sky that's shining.
Is it the moon or the sun?"
The third drunk looked at the sky and then looked at them and said,
"Sorry, I don't live around here."

Bears not into Psycholgy

A woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona
when her car broke down.
An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town.
She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off.
The ride was uneventful,
except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a “Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a”
so loud that it echoed from the surrounding hills.
When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station,
yelled one final “Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!” and rode off.
“What did you do to get that Indian so excited?” asked the service-station attendant.
“Nothing,” the woman answered.
“I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist,
and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn’t fall off.”
“Lady,” the attendant said , “Indians don’t use saddles…….!!!!”

Again with the Funny Signs

A guy's sitting in a bar having a drink.
All of a sudden an alien sits down next to him, licks its finger and sticks it in the guys ear.
He's a little annoyed, but doesn't say anything.
The next thing he knows, the alien does it again.
This time the guy tells him to quit.
Five minutes later, it happens again.
This time he yells at him to stop.
Ten minutes later, he finds a finger in his ear.
Finally, he jumps up and screams,
" If you don't quit I'm gonna rip your balls off!".
The alien thinks about it for a second, and does it again.
The guy jumps up, pulls its pants down,
but there was nothing there!
In frustration he asks, "How do you screw?!!"
The alien smiles and sticks his finger in the guys ear.

Tough Guy

Sunset from Space

A married couple was on holiday in Jamaica .
They were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods
and such when they passed this small sandal shop.
From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say
, "You foreigners!
Come in. Come into my humble shop!"
So they walked in, and the Jamaican said,
"I have some special sandals I tink you would be interested in...
Dey make you wild at sex.
The wife got really interested in buying the sandals,
but the husband felt he really didn't need them, being the sex god he was.
The husband asked the shopkeeper,
"How could sandals make you into a sexfreak?
The Jamaican replied, "Just try dem on, Mon.
You doan haff to do nutting cept try dem on.
" So the husband, after some badgering from his wife,
finally gave in, and tried them on.
As soon as he slipped them onto his feet,
he got this wild look in his eyes, something his wife hadn't seen in many years!
In the blink of an eye, the husband grabbed the Jamaican,
bent him violently over a table, yanked down his pants, ripped down his own pants,
and grabbed a firm hold of the Jamaican's hips.
The Jamaican then began screaming,
"You got dem on da wrong feet! Mon, you got dem on da wrong feet!"...
thanks Gordon Hamilton

This should keep you amused for hours

Do you know your arse from your elbow?

Click here: Arse or Elbow?
thanks Gordon Hamilton

Today's Video Clip
is Chet Atkins version of the Johnny Cash classic
Orange Blossom Special
Chet Atkins....Orange Blossom Special

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