After a very hectic weekend its time for a blog
Great Sporting weekend
With the Eagles defeatig the Adelaide Crows on their homeground
and the Wallabies [Rugby Union ]beating the NZ All Blacks
Who said Australia hasn't got talent??
This takes a bit of courage to do
But it is very funny
He was known for hardly ever attending church,
so the next time the pastor saw him, he told him,
"You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
Answered he: "I am already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Asked the pastor:
"So how come I never see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back: "I am in the secret service."
A man hated his wife's cat and he decided to get rid of it.
He drove 20 blocks away from home and dropped the cat there.
The cat was already walking up the driveway
when he approached his home.
The next day, he decided to drop the cat 40 blocks away
but the same thing happened.
He kept increasing the number of blocks
but the cat kept coming home before him.
At last he decided to drive a few miles away,
turn right, then left, past the bridge ,
then right again and another right and so on
until he reached what he thought was a perfect spot
and dropped the cat there.
Hour later.... The man calls his wife at home and asked her,
"Jen is the cat there?"
"Yes, why do you ask?" answered the wife.
Frustrated the man said,
" Put that damn cat on the phone, I am lost and I need directions!!!
A man went fishing one day.
He looked over the side of his boat
and saw a snake with a frog in its mouth.
Feeling sorry for the frog, he reached down,
gently took the frog from the snake, and set the frog free.
But then he felt sorry for the snake.
He looked around the boat, but he had no food.
All he had was a bottle of bourbon.
So he opened the bottle and gave the snake a few shots.
The snake went off happy,
the frog was happy,
and the man was happy to have performed such good deeds.
He thought everything was great until about ten minutes passed
and he heard something knock against the side of the boat.
With stunned disbelief,
the fisherman looked down and saw the snake was back with two frogs!
The homeowner got into his grubbiest clothes
on Saturday morning and set about all the chores
he'd been putting off for weeks.
He'd cleaned the garage,
pruned the hedge,
and was halfway through mowing the lawn
when a woman pulled up in the driveway
and yelled out her window,
"Say, what do you get for yard work?"
The fellow thought for a minute, then answered,
"The lady who lives here, lets me sleep with her."
With petrol prices going up,
I had to purchase a new form
Philosophy of Stock Markets
Once upon a time in a village a man appeared
who announced to the villagers that he
would buy monkeys for 10 rupees.
The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys
went out in the forest and started catching them.
The man bought thousands at 10 and
as supply started to diminish
and villagers started to stop their effort
he announced that now he would buy at 20 rupees.
This renewed the efforts of the villagers
and they started catching moneys again.
Soon the supply diminished even further
and people started going back to their farms.
The offer rate increased to 25
and the supply of monkeys became so that it was an effort
to even see a monkey let alone catch it.
The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at 50!
However, since he had to go to the city on some business
his assistant would now buy on behalf of the man.
In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers
"Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected.
I will sell them to you at 35
and when the man comes back you can sell it to him for 50."
The villagers queued up with all their savings
and bought the monkeys.
The assistant promptly vanished the next day
leaving a villagefull of monkeys
Roy Orbison and KD Lang