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Footy finals start tomorrow evening with the Eagles playing Port Power in Adelaide, Should be a great game
With the Eagles being the team now representing WA I wonder how many Docker supporters will barrack for them
My answer is not many, which is a pity as I would supprt Freo if the roles were reversed
This is the most awesome video I have seen for sometime
Do yourself a favour and watch it a couple of times
Cadbury's Dairy Milk Advert of a Gorilla emotionally drumming
to Phil Collins song "In The Air Tonight"
Cadbury's has unveiled a £6.2m campaign for Dairy Milk featuring a gorilla playing the drum solo of Phil Collins' track 'In the Air Tonight'.
Say no more
Australia has become a very multi-cultured society with immigrants, arriving from every corner of the planet
It is only fair that this new citzenship questionairre has been devised to help them understand the Aussie Language, Customs, Food and Culture
New Australian Citizenship Test
LANGUAGE
1. Do you understand the meaning, or are able to explain the origin of, the term "died in the arse"?
2. What is a mole?
3. Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey?
4. Explain the following passage: "In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo."
CUSTOMS
1. Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash?
2. Complete the following sentences: a) "If the van's rockin' don't bother ... b) You're going home in the back of a .... c) Fair suck of the .
3. I've had a gutful and I can't be fagged. Discuss
4. Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie?
5. Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard "up on blocks"? Is his name Keith and does he have a wife called Cheryl?
FOOD
1. Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming?
2. What are the ingredients in a rissole?
3. Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam.
4. Do you have an Aunty Myrna who is famous for her tuna mornay and other dishes involving a can of cream of celery soup?
5. In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else's beer that has been nicked from a bath full of ice?
6. When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people's meat or are you only allowed to eat your own?
7. What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter "b" is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot?
CULTURE
1. Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots?
2. Is it possible to "prang a car" while doing "circle work"?
3. Who would you like to crack on to?
4. Who is the most Australian: Kevin "Bloody" Wilson, John "True Blue" Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie?
5. Is there someone you are only mates with because they own a trailer or have a pool?
6. Would you love to have a beer with Duncan?
[Thanks to Ron Wilson]
In a city park stood two beautiful statues, one female and the other male -- both nude.
These two statues faced each other for many, many years
.Early one morning an angel appeared before the statues and said,
"The two of you have been truly exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people that have visited the park over the years.
I am hereby authorized by God to give you the greatest wish that can be bestowed upon you.
I grant you the gift of life -- albeit, as a limited offer.
You have thirty minutes to do whatever your hearts desire."
And with that command, the two statues came to life.
They smiled at each other, slowly moved their limbs about in wonderment.
They looked all around, at their own bodies and back at each other.
Smiling, they then ran to the nearby woods and dove behind a large bush.
The angel smiled to herself as she listened to the giggling,
bushes rustling and twigs snapping. (Angels aren't naive.)
After fifteen minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes,
looking extremely satisfied and wearing nothing but even bigger smiles than before.
Puzzled, the angel looked at her watch and said to them,
"You still have fifteen minutes. Wouldn't you like to continue?"
The male statue looked at the female and asked,
"Do you want to do it again?"
"Oh yes!" the female statue replied.
"But this time you hold the pigeon down and I'll dump on its head."
Would you buy a watch from this bloke?
Birth of the Blues
With the Rat Pack[Sinatra, Martin, Sammy Davis, and Johnny Carson]
Don't we all Bill
A young boy was looking through the family photographs
& asked his Grandmother:
“ Who is this man on the beach with you with all the muscles & the curly hair”
Grandmother happily said “That’s your grandfather”
The young boy thought for awhile & then asked:
“ Then who is that old baldy fat man who lives with you now”
[Thanks Frank Carter]
Two men were driving through Esperance when they got pulled over.
Two men were walking through the bush and came upon a big black, deep hole.
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