Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Its the middle of the week again
Some more welcome rain is forecast for the metro area over the next few days
If anyone is interested , following the footage I posted last blog regarding
Barry Halls king hit in the footy [behind the play]
He got 7 weeks and to my mind got off pretty lightly

Women sure know how to time things

stolen fromShelleys Snippets

This clip is especially for all you lovely ladies out there
Skating Cowboys

stolen from
Miss Cellania

Gourmet Reporter
A magazine reporter is traveling through a rainforest, in search of a fabled cannibalistic tribe.
He falls into a trap, goes unconscious and wakes up tied to a stake with
a fire burning slowly underneath him.
He cries out for help, and is answered by what is obviously one of the tribesmen,
who informs him that he is going to be served as dinner to the leader of the tribe.
"But you don''t understand!" he cries,
"You can''t do this to me! I''m an editor for the New Yorker magazine!"
"Ah," replies the tribesman,
"Well look on the bright side.
Soon you will be editor-in-chief!"


A rather cocky U.S. Department of Agriculture representative stopped at a farm
and talked with an old farmer in New Hampshire.
He told the farmer, 'I need to inspect your farm.'
The old farmer said, 'OK, but don't go in that field right over yonder.'
The Agriculture representative said,
'Mister, I have the authority of the United States Government with me.
See this badge? This badge means I am allowed
to go WHEREVER I WISH on any agricultural land.
No questions asked or answered. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?'
The farmer nodded politely and went about his farm chores.
Half an hour later, the farmer heard loud screams
and saw the Agriculture Rep running for the fence
and close behind was the farmer's huge-horned prize bull.
The bull was gaining on the Agriculture Rep with every step.
The Rep was clearly terrified,
so the farmer immediately threw down his tools, ran to the fence and shouted out:
'Your badge! Your badge! Show him your badge!'

To participate is very easy, just view the attached photo, correctlyanswer the following questions and send your answers to:International Olympic Committee, Private Bag, Lausanne, Switzerland.
1. Which student seems to appear tired / sleepy?
2. Which ones are male twins?
3. Which ones are the female twins?
4. How many women are in the group?
5. Which one is the teacher?

stolen from
A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms.
Clearly impressed, he buys a pack.
Upon getting home he announces to his wife the purchase he just made.
"Olympic condoms?" she asks, "What makes them so special?"
"There are three colors," he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze."
"What color are you going to wear tonight?" she asks cheekily.
"Gold of course," says the man proudly.
The wife responds,
"Really, why don't you wear Silver,
it would be nice if you came second for a change!"
Three women were sitting around talking about their sex lives.
The first said, "I think my husband's like a championship golfer.
He's spent the last ten years perfecting his stroke.
"The second woman said, "My husband's like the winner of the Indy 500.
Every time we get into bed he gives me several hundred exciting laps."
The third woman was silent until she was asked,
"Tell us about your husband."
She thought for a moment and said,
"My husband's like an Olympic gold-medal-winning quarter-miler."
"How so?"
"He's got his time down to under 40 seconds."
Olympic Wrestlers
Our story begins at the Olympics, specifically the wrestling event.
It is narrowed down to the Russian or the American for the gold medal.
Before the final match, the American wrestler's trainer came to him and said,
"Now don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian.
He's never lost a match because of this "pretzel" hold he has.
Whatever you do, don't let him get you in this hold!
If he does, you're finished!"
The wrestler nodded in agreement.
Now, to the match
The American and the Russian circled each other several times looking for an opening.
All of a sudden the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the American
and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold!
A sigh of disappointment went up from the crowd,
and the trainer buried his face in his hands for he knew all was lost.
He couldn't watch the ending.
Suddenly there was a scream, a cheer from the crowd,
and the trainer raised his eye just in time to see the Russian flying up in the air.
The Russian's back hit the mat with a thud,
and the American weakly collapsed on top of him,
getting the pin and winning the match.
The trainer was astounded!
When he finally got the American wrestler alone, he asks,
"How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!"
The wrestler answered,
"Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold,
but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of balls right in front of my face."
I thought I had nothing to lose,
so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck
and bit those babies just as hard as I could.
"You'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own balls!"
stolen from
It occurred to me

The Joys of Parenting

My wife told me that she felt her body had gotten totally out of shape,
so she got her doctor’s permission to join a fitness club
and start exercising.
She decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
She bent,
She twisted,
She gyrated,
She jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.
But, by the time she got her leotards on, the class was over.

Go SpongeBob

The last of the Signs

Its request time
My Daughter Rennae just adores Robbie Williams
[shes got over her George Michael stage]
Robbie Williams...She's the one
There are hundreds of cover versions of this song
This is the one I like best
The clarity of the video is not the best
But theres nothing better than
EmmyLou Harris....Save the last dance for me

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