Wednesday, May 28, 2008


Funny Toyota Advert

Some Points to Ponder..

1. Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.

2. There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

3. When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself

.4. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

5. Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain

.6. A penny saved is a government oversight.

7. The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

8. The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.

9. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

10. He who hesitates is probably right.

11. If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

12. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

13. The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

Cartoons... Fish and Fishing

The people in this audience were lucky to see this[ from 1977]
Carl Perkins,Roy Orbison, Johnny Cash, Jerry Lee Lewis
This Train

And speaking of Roy Orbison
This for his fans out there [me included]
The extraordinary voice of Roy Orbison

Walk On

Flowers would have been a better idea

Train at Home

There were two girls seated on a plane, beside one another.
One was from the North and one from the South.
The girl from the South asked very politely,
"Where ya from?"
The girl from the North said,
" A place that knows better than to use a preposition at the end of a sentence."
The girl from the South replied,
"Oh, okay, where ya from, Bitch?"

Bears riding horses????

More stuff to ponder
(1) Zero Gravity
When NASA first started sending up astronauts,
they quickly discovered that ball-point pens would not work in zero gravity.
To combat this problem
NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen
that writes in zero gravity, upside-down,
on almost any surface including glass
and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300 C.
The Russians used a pencil.
Your taxes are due again--enjoy paying them.

(2) The American Constitution
They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq .
Why don't they just give them the Ameican one?
It was written by a lot of really smart guys,
and it's worked for over 200 years.
And, they're not using it anymore.

(3) Ten Commandments
The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse
is that you cannot post
"Thou Shalt Not Steal,"
"Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery"
and "Thou Shall Not Lie"
in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians.
It creates a hostile work environment.

I wonder what song he got the gold record for??

The Alabama preacher said to his Congregation,
"Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan.
This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate.
I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this.
Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God
and this Christian family."
No one moved.
The preacher continued,

"Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood?
Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory.
Now stand and confess your transgression. "
Again all was quiet.
Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body

that would stop traffic rose from the third pew.
Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke,
"Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding.
I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan.
I simply told a couple of my friends you were a wizard under the sheets."
The preacher fainted, and the congregation roared.


Ihave been looking for this song on you tube for awhile
At last sommeone has posted it
Hope you enjoy it as much as Ido
Its just a great song

Nitty Gritty Dirt Band...An American Dream



nickjmb said...

I find your blog very funny, pretty much like mine.hey I was just wondering if you wanna exchange links. I put yours on mine you put mine on yours. Its like an allience.

Phils Phun said...

No worries Nickjmb
It is done
Heres to the alliance

william said...

FYI, that old story about the 12 billion dollar NASA space pen is an urban legend. Just thought I'd mention it so you wouldn't look stupid in the future passing this hoax along.

Phils Phun said...

Thanks for that, William
This is a blog to make you smile
Urban legend or whatever

nickjmb said...

hey so I already put your link on my blog. You should put mine on yours now. cheers to our new alliance.