Wednesday, July 23, 2008

150


Is it just me, or have you noticed that every 2nd blog you look at
there are pictures and photos of cats
What is the fascination with cats!!!!
My wife has two and several hanging around
If Ihad my way we would live in a cat-less society

Picture stolen from ..Blame it on the voices


A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms.
Clearly impressed, he buys a pack.
Upon getting home he announces to his wife the purchase he just made.
"Olympic condoms?" she she says, rolling her eyes.
"What makes them so special?"
"There are three colors," he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze."
"Yeah, so?" she says.
"What color are you going to wear tonight?"
"Gold of course," the man says proudly.
"Really, dear, why don't you wear Silver," she responds.
"It would be nice if you were second for a change!"
"That's fine," he said without missing a beat.
"As long as you have your sister here for 'Bronze night'."


A couple of funny Ads from Indian TV
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A woman goes to the doctor for her yearly physical.
The nurse starts with certain basic items.
'How much do you weigh?' she asks.
'115,' she says.
The nurse puts her on the scale It turns out her weight is 140.
The nurse asks, 'Your height?''
5 foot 8,' she says.
The nurse checks and sees that she only measures 5 foot 5.
She then takes her blood pressure and tells the woman it is very high.
'Of course it's high!' she screams,
'When I came in here I was tall and slender!
Now I'm short and fat!'
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Good for Business[it pays to advertise]



Beer is now cheaper than gas.
Drink, don't drive!
You prefer coffee? CLICK HERE!
Place your coin in the slot
and select your coffee
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Cartoons













It Doesn't matter anymore
Linda Ronstadt


Judith Durham [Seekers]




A WOMAN’S POEM:
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who’s not a creep,
One who’s handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who’ll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he’s gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won’t be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door.
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who’ll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to ‘how big is my behind?’
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
A MAN’S POEM:
I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with
huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course,
and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This
doesn’t rhyme and I don’t give a shit.






Thought for the day
Where there's a will...
There's a dead person.








Are you the Plumber????







Two residents of an old folk's home were sitting alone in the lobby one evening.
The old man looked over and said to the old lady,
"I know just what you're wanting.
For $5.00 I'll have sex with you right over there in that rocking chair."
The old lady looked surprised but didn't say a word.
The old man continued,
"For $10 I'll do it with you on that nice soft sofa over there."
She flushed a bit, but still said nothing.
"But for $20," he finally said,
"I'll take you back to my room, light some candles,
and give you the most romantic evening you've ever had in your life."
She still didn't say anything, so the man kept quiet.
But after a couple minutes she started digging into her purse.
She pulled out a wrinkled $20 bill and held it up toward the man.
"So," the man says with a grin,
"you want the nice romantic evening in my room!"
"Get serious," she snapped.
"What do I need romance for at my age?
Give me four times in the rocker!"
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What's the difference?
What's the difference between a hematologist and a urologist?
The hematologist pricks your finger.





The Bear and the Bee


stolen from Bits and Pieces



Phillips Brewing offers you an Ale




1 comment:

Anonymous said...

And the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can't hear an enzyme.

Nice videos.