Thursday, July 19, 2007

46

Thursday night here in the west

21mm of rain today.Fantastic and reports of it reaching the wheatbelt

Another interesting weekend of footy coming up

The Dockers have a new coach after Chris Connolly was pushed, sacked or resigned

and Ben Cousins looks set to play his first game after kicking his drug habit??

This post will have a MEN flavour so to start here is a funny banned commercial

Banned Comercial "Men in Toilet"



Cow protest



ALZHEIMER'S OR PARKINSONS…
Which one would you rather have?
PARKINSONS of course!
Better to spill half your drink than forget where the heck you put it!




GOLF




More Golf





More pee-ing At the Tour de France

Little Johnny is in a class where every Friday the teacher asks a question
and if you get it right you don't have to go to school on Monday.
The first Friday the question was,
"How many gallons of water is there in the whole world."
No one knew so they all had to go to school on Monday.
Next Friday, the question was,
"How many grains of sand is there in the whole world."
No one knew so they had to go to school on Monday.
By this time Little Johnny is getting mad because
he doesn't want to go to school on Monday.
So he paints two ping-pong balls black and the next Friday
right before the teacher asked the question
he rolled the two black ping-pong balls up to her.
She said, "Who is the comedian with two black balls?"
Little Johnny said,
"Bill Cosby, see you on Tuesday."

MEN




"I know I'm really good in bed
because women always ask me
if there's any possible way
I could make it last longer. "










A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone,
come in on a fairly regular basis.
After the second week, he made his move.
"No thank you." she said politely
. "This may sound rather odd in this day and age,
but I'm keeping myself pure until I meet the man I love."
"That must be rather difficult." the man replied.
"Oh, I don't mind too much." she said.
"But, it has my husband pretty upset."



As long as I have legs to walk on you'll never have to
take out the garbage

I like to get to these things before I have to be asked





Even men Bears like creature comforts


Carn you blokes, I'll take you for a spin

"Getting Even"

One December day we found an old straggly cat at our door.
She was a sorry sight.
Starving, dirty, smelled terrible, skinny and hair all matted down.
We felt sorry for her, put her in a carrier and took her to the vet.
We didn't know what to call her, so we named her "Pussycat."

The vet decided to keep her for a day or so.
He said he would let us know when we could come and get her.

My husband (the complainer) said,
"OK, but don't forget to wash her because she stinks."
He reminded the vet that it was his WIFE (me)
who wanted the dirty cat, Not him.

My husband and my Vet don't see eye-to-eye.
The vet calls my husband 'El-Cheap-O',
and my husband calls the vet 'El-Charge-O'.

They love to hate each other and constantly 'snipe' at one another,
with my husband getting in the last word on this particular occasion.

The next day my husband had an appointment with his doctor,
who is located in the same building, next door to the vet.
The MD's waiting room and office were full of people
waiting to see the Doctor.
A side door opened and the vet leaned in
- he had obviously seen my husband arrive.
He looked straight at my husband and in a loud voice said,
"Your wife's pussy doesn't stink anymore
and it's finally clean and shaved,
so she now smells like a rose.
Oh, and, by the way, I think she's pregnant.
God only knows who the Father is!"

Then he closed the door.
That, my friends, is getting even.

The forever delightful Judith Durham
"Time and Again"
Iknow my good friend Madeleine will love this [Hi Madeleine]
The two most common elements in the universe
are hydrogen and stupidity
But not in that order





















2 comments:

Hale McKay said...

Chock full of laughs as usual, Phil. Good show.

Hale McKay said...

G'Day, Phil. You have been named a recipient of a Blogging Award. For the details, drop my site via the link to below to collect your SCHMOOZE AWARD.