Wednesday, April 23, 2008

122

We have a long weekend coming up starting Friday
April 25th is ANZAC Day in Australia and New Zealand
This is the time when we rememember the scarifices made
by our armed forces in World wars and other conflicts


Retired Drill Team


When I first saw this I thought these blokes were Aussies




stolen from Shelleys Snippets





Four Catholic Ladies

Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together.

The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest.

When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a Bishop.

Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic woman says smugly, "My son is a Cardinal.

Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence.

The first three women give her this subtle

"Well.....?"

She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6'2", hard bodied stripper.

When he walks into a room, people say,

'Oh my God...'"







CARTOONS [Misc]















Optimism vs Pessimism
An optimist sees the best in the world
while a pessimist sees only the worst.
An optimist finds the positive in the negative,

and a pessimist can only find the negative in the positive.
For example, an avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog.

His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him.
He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his,

a pessimist by nature, and invited him to hunt with him and his new dog.
As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by.

they fired, and a duck fell.
The dog responded and jumped into the water.
The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird,
never getting more than his paws wet.
This continued all day long;
each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it.
The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word.
On the drive home the hunter asked his friend,

“Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?”
“I sure did,” responded the pessimist.

“Your dog can’t swim!”



The best Camel Toe picture ever taken

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stolen from NortyGordy

Mommy Test
I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter.
She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth.
I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.
"Why?" my daughter asked.
"Because it's been on the ground, you don't know where it's been,
it's dirty and probably has germs" I replied.
At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked,
"Mommy, how do you know all this stuff? You are so smart."
I was thinking quickly. "All moms know this stuff. It's on the Mommy Test.
You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mommy."
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes,
but she was evidently pondering this new information.
"OH...I get it!" she beamed,
"So if you don't pass the test, you have to be the daddy."
"Exactly", I replied back with a big smile on my face.
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Joe was talking to his buddy at the bar, and he said,
“I don’t know what to get my wife for her birthday –
she has everything, and besides,
she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I’m stumped.”
His buddy said, “I have an idea –
why don’t you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex,
any way she wants it – she’ll probably be thrilled.”
So that’s what Joe did.
The next day at the bar his buddy said,
“Well? Did you take my suggestion?”
“Yes, I did,” said Joe.
“Did she like it?” His buddy asked.
“Oh yes! she jumped up , thanked me, kissed me on the forehead
and ran out the door, yelling
“I’ll be back in an hour!!”
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This video is for my very good Blog pal Miss Cellania as she is the one who encouraged me to start blogging. Miss C lives in the back blocks of Kentucky???

So just for Miss Cellania is

Mark Knopfler and Scotty Moore

Blue Moon of Kentucky




Greedy Monkey


HiFives






A Professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and
empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.
So the Professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.
He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.
The Professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with an unanimous "Yes."
The Professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table
and poured the entire contents into the jar,
effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.
"Now," said the Professor, as the laughter subsided,
"I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things -
your family, your children, your health, your friends, your favorite passions -
' things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car.
The sand is everything else - the small stuff."
"If you put the sand into the jar first", he continued,
"there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
you will never have room for the things that are important to you.
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
Play another 18.
There will always be time to clean the house, and fix the disposal.
Take care of the golf balls first,
the things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand."
When he had finished, there was a profound silence.
Then one of the students raised her hand and with a puzzled expression,
inquired what the beer represented.
The Professor smiled.
"I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there's always room for a couple of beers."


Mans Best Friend






















A picture paints a thousand words




MUSIC
One of those songs that will live on for ever in your mind
This song has been one of my all time classics that takes me
back to the 60's every time Ihear it
Here are two excellent versions
One is the original and he other a cover version by Johnny Cash
Sloop John B............The Beach Boys [1960]
My mate Bunk over at Tacky Raccoons will enjoy this version
Sloop John B........Johnny Cash

















2 comments:

Miss Cellania said...

Thank you for the song dedication! That was sweet.

Anonymous said...

Ditto that, Phil. You got some fans up here in the land of the onions and the eels. (Never heard that version of "Sloop John B." either.)