485

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Lets Dance

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and now your in the mood

How about a little Cha Cha!!

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Italian Lean Masters

thanks Liz Z

----

Jewish Modesty Regarding Finances

The Catholic : “I have a large fortune....Iam going to buy Citibank!”

The Protestant : “I am very wealthy and will buy GeneralMotors!”

The Muslim : “I am a fabulously rich prince.... I intend to purchase Microsoft!”

They then all wait for the Jew to speak....

The Jew stirs his coffee, places the spoon neatly on the table,

 takes a sip of his coffee, looks at them and casually says:

 “I'm not selling."

thanks Don H

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JAYWALKING

----------------------

At the Duplex

-----------------------------

------------------------

The Iranian Ambassador to the United Nations had just finished giving a speech

and walked out into the lobby where he met the U.S. President.

They shook hands, and as they walked the Iranian said,

"You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America."

The President said, "Well, anything I can do to help you, I will."

The Iranian whispered

 "My son watches this television show 'Star Trek'

 and in it there is Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish,

 Uhura who is black and Sulu who is Japanese, but no Muslims.

 My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any

Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Syrians or Pakistanis on Star Trek."

The President laughed, leaned toward the Iranian ambassador,

 and whispered back,

"That's because it takes place in the future."

-----------------------------------

 Those Funny Animals

Low Fat Milk

---

A bit of Wisdom

---

God summons President Barack Obama, Chinese Leader Hu Jintao

 and French President Nicolas Sarkozy to a meeting.

He then tells them that he has decided to end the world in 3 days

and orders them to tell their people.

 President Obama has a television speech to America and says,

 "I have good news and bad news.

 The good news is that there is a God.

 The bad news is that he will destroy the world in 3 days."

Leader Hu has a television speech to the Chinese people.

 He tells them,

 "I have bad news and worse news.

 The bad news is that there is a God.

 The worse news is that the world is going to end in 3 days

and you're all going to hell."

President Sarkozy goes on television and tells the French people,

 "I have good news and better news.

 The good news is that there is a God and he spoke to me!

The better news is that the European economic crisis

will be over in 3 days!!!"

--------------------------------


---

Smooth as.....

-------------------------

Early pictures of Movie Stars

----------------------------



Dining Out In The World



thanks Kitty L

------------------------------------

-

thanks Glynis G

----------------------------

thanks Diane McV

-------

Golf

How to Quit

--

My five-year-old nephew wanted to caddy for my brother's golf game.

"You have to count my strokes," my brother told him.

 "How much is six plus nine plus eight?"

"Five," answered the nephew.

"Okay," my brother said, "let's go."

thanks to Toni S for the Golf stuff

----------------

------

 Funny Signs

------------------------

-

You can't fix Stupid !!!

-----------------

--

I brought four tires to a friend's garage sale and was asking $30 apiece.

 I needed to leave for a few minutes,

 so I asked my friend if he could watch them for me.

 He agreed and asked, "If someone came along

and offered less, how low would you go?"

"Try for more, but I will accept $15," I said and left.

An hour later,

 I returned to find my tires were gone.

"How much did you get for them?" I asked.

My friend proudly replied, "Fifteen dollars each."

"Who bought them?" I inquired.

"I did," he said.

---------

Ain't this the truth!!

been there...done that

------------------------------------------------

Reinvented

------------------------------

The Grim Reaper

----------------------------

Warning!!

The following video is a bit naughty

but Hilarious

thanks Kitty L

---------------------

Valentines Day

----------------------------------

PHILS PHILOSOPHY

Disclaimer

All posts, jokes, stories, cartoons, photos and videos on this site

are understood to be in the public domain.

If you hold the copyright to any of them and would like me to remove them,

please contact Phil at philco@iinet.net.au.